First Unitarian Society of Minneapolis

Rev. Kendyl Gibbons
First Unitarian Society of Minneapolis
January 5, 2003

These are the days of seventy five percent off on Christmas stuff. Provided that you have the patience, and the storage, to keep cards and wrapping paper and decorations until next year, you can save a lot of money on these items. In this spirit, I have a bit of seasonal trivia for you, but you will have to store it in some back closet of your brain for when Christmas comes again. Has anyone here ever wondered why there are traditionally supposed to be twelve days of Christmas? The Christian calendar has them ending tomorrow, with the feast of the Epiphany, which is associated in legend with the time when the Magi actually completed their journey and discovered the baby Jesus, leaving him gifts and "returning to their own country by another way" so as to avoid King Herod. But why the number twelve? Well, you know, scratch a Christian custom and you will find a pagan awareness underneath. In this case, an astronomical quirk that I was never aware of until just recently; you may have read it in the newspaper too. It seems that the solstice is not as neat a package as I had always assumed. Although December 21 is the longest night, and after that the daylight hours start to increase, the growing light is not divided evenly between morning and evening. It's not a one for one earlier sunrise and later sunset. In point of fact, the sunrise continues to get later for two weeks following the solstice; the days are longer only because the sunset comes later by more than the dawn does. It is not until approximately two weeks after the solstice - or twelve days after Christmas - that the sun actually starts to rise earlier in the morning, and the days begin to get longer at both ends. The feast of the Epiphany, which will be tomorrow, takes place on the first day that sunrise is earlier than the previous day. So next year, you can amaze your friends with this information, and tomorrow we can all rejoice that the dawn is just a few moments earlier. And by the way, congratulations to all of you for getting out of bed and over to church on this, the latest morning of the whole year!

Given this, it seems to me that we are still in good time, astronomically speaking, to consider that perennial topic of the beginning of a new year - resolutions. Now, I grant that it is an accepted cultural truism that most well-intentioned new years resolutions do not endure long into the month of February, I still want to talk about them this morning. However, I want to talk about resolutions of a different kind, because I think there is a reason for the high early mortality of most of our plans for self improvement, and it is this: most such resolutions are expressions of frustration with the individual's life. They are made in isolation, to remedy some perceived defect, but they are not related to any overall life plan or value system. The larger opportunity of a new year, it seems to me, is to look again at that plan, that overall purpose that is meant to direct our lives, and to assess how the various elements are working out in relationship to each other. The plans for life change or self improvement that are most likely to succeed in the long run grow out of knowing, and remembering, what it is that we want.

Will power, or self discipline, that famous key to accomplishments of any kind, is only this; the capacity to remember what we want. It means remembering in the face of habit and inertia, when the path of least resistance would be to do what we have always done, which pretty much ensures that we will get what we have always gotten. It means not allowing ourselves to be distracted by the other opportunities and urgencies that inevitably crowd our lives, but remembering the goal that we thoughtfully selected as the highest priority. In the worlds of the liberation spiritual, in means to keep your eyes on the prize. To remember what you truly want is to inoculated against the blandishments of a consumer culture, that constantly offers to satisfy our impulsive and trivial desires at the price of the committed focus that is required to achieve larger and more worthwhile goals.

But let me be clear that life plans, or values, are not all about achievement. It should be abundantly clear from the plethora of cautionary tales that we see all around us, both fictionalized and all too real, that it is entirely possible to spend one's days piling up accomplishment after accomplishment, and yet end up with a life that is both morally repugnant and personally empty. Neither wealth nor fame nor any other form of externally defined success is actually sufficient to make for a satisfying or honorable biography. A bank account, or a stack of diplomas, is no substitute for the fulfillment that comes of living with integrity, purpose, generosity, and gladness. To borrow a distinction, our values are ultimately not so much about what we want to do as they are about what we want to be, about growing into the kind of person that we sincerely admire and wish to become. And it is that aspiration, that vision of the kind of person we would choose to be, that it seems to me offers a fruitful topic for contemplation, particularly at this pivotal moment of the year.

We as humanists are not alone in this question and this quest, although we have our own unique spin on it. Many other religious perspectives begin with the assumption that we as human beings do not have it in our own power to become the kind of people we want to be, or even to know what kind of kind of people we should be, without the help of some type of divine information or assistance. So when the adherents of these faiths ask the traditional questions, What must we do to be saved? They are not necessarily interested only in the next world or an afterlife; they may equally well be asking, What do I need to do in order to become the person I want to be, to live a fulfilled and decent life in this world, and how can I know what that looks like? This is a question in which we all share; one of the defining doctrines of liberal religion has always been that we have both the ability and the responsibility as human beings to answer it for ourselves; that we can and must decide what kind of people we want to be and work to realize our aspirations, without supernatural guidance. For the early American Unitarians, like William Ellery Channing, this was perhaps the heart of their gospel, that each of us has the power to know and choose the good, and that the more we exercise that ability, the more it grows, so that over time we develop what they called character, and become people of integrity.

These spiritual ancestors of ours also believed that one of the tests of character was how it helped the individual to confront personal difficulties and situations of hardship. To be true to one's values, to be caring and responsible and generous and cheerful when things are going well and life is easy, is one thing; to live by them loyally also in times of scarcity, suffering or disappointment is a different and much more difficult matter. Of course, their lives two hundred years ago offered ample scope for these kinds of tests; modern medicine was in its infancy, and people often suffered chronic pain from assorted physical ailments; the deaths of siblings, spouses, children and friends was commonplace; the networks of social assistance were tenuous, and people frequently went hungry and cold; women, immigrants, racial minorities, children, and the poor had few rights. Character, then, was expressed in part by how you responded to these eventualities in your own experience; were your values consistent in adversity with what they were in easier times? And by the same token, could you accept good fortune and use it responsibly, generously, and modestly, or did prosperity change you and see you become selfish, proud, or profligate?

Character was seen as one of the few constants in life, precisely because it was independent of particular situations, and the development of character was understood as the way to prepare for the potential vicissitudes of the world. You could not ensure that disaster wasn't going to happen, you could only try to develop the kind of integrity that was capable of encountering disaster with its character intact. I submit that we liberals of the present day would be well advised to take a leaf from our predecessors' book. The national mood, here at the start of the year 2003, is not sympathetic to much of our collective progressive vision, and we are so used to being in the popular ascendancy that we scarcely know how to act. We must do what we can to stop this runaway freight train toward war on which we find ourselves unwilling passengers, and we must bend our efforts toward resisting the appalling loss of liberties that is overtaking our heritage of rights and freedoms without the firing of a shot. But we must also recognize that our professed values are but poor things if they only work for us when things are easy and the world is moving our way. If it is going to be war without and tyranny within for the foreseeable future, how shall we prepare ourselves? What must we do, in order to endure the hard times of a world gone - let us hope temporarily - mad?

Consider our options. There is always corruption, the idea that if you can't beat 'em, the best thing is to join 'em, and never mind what your ideals once were if you can make yourself reasonably comfortable in the new regime. There is despair, which comes in two varieties. One is cynicism, the bitter, mocking resignation which scorns any loyalty to values as a fool's errand. The other form of despair is violence, which abandons the connection of values to means, only to lose it inevitably also to ends, and finish in the ashes of complete destruction. There is also simple fear, which retreats into survival mode, keeping its head down, seeing nothing, standing for nothing, hoping only to escape notice. And finally, there is character, which makes the effort to bear witness to truth, and to live by the same humane values in times of oppression and hardship as it did in the days of prosperity and peace.

The question is before us today as it has not been for perhaps more than a generation; what kind of people are we? And what kind of people do we hope to be? Can we remember, when the going gets tough, individually and collectively, what we want? I suggest to you that our little individual resolutions of self improvement are not enough. Not that they don't matter, but that they are flimsy in isolation. I think we need two things, and that's why you have this Checklist included in your orders of service today. First, I think we need to be making and living into integrated sets of values and life plans, every one of us. I think that each of us needs to take the time to do the spiritual work of deciding what kind of individuals we want to be, what values we want to characterize our lives, and what fulfillment would look like from our personal perspective. No one can give you the answers to these questions, for as we are different and diverse human beings, so each of our visions and paths will be different, and we must discover them for ourselves. Assuredly, you can learn a great deal from the examples of people you admire, but God is not going to reach down and give you the answers, nor can you just borrow someone else's because it's easier that way. The two first steps on the path of spiritual growth, or character if you prefer, are to know yourself and to know what you want. And if that sounds like a daunting assignment, all the more reason to be about it with commitment and vigor.

That's the first thing we need. The second is to be engaged in a collective conversation about what constitutes character and integrity, and how we can best develop them. We can't give each other our individual answers, but that doesn't mean that we have to be about this project alone. Just as we know some things about physics and biology and music and emotional development based on the past experiences and accumulated wisdom of the human race, so I submit that we also know a few things about what makes for meaningful and decent human lives. One of those things that we know is that satisfying lives are lived in communities; communities of dialogue, exploration, mutual support, and celebration. Communities of memory and promise, like this one. And we know, too, that when the going gets tough, it is such communities that help us to remember what we want, to develop and to endure as people of character, whose values stood the test of difficulty and did not yield to corruption, or fear, or despair.

The questions on this checklist are presented from the point of view of a member of this community. If you are a visitor here today, I invite you to substitute the community of your own deepest commitment, the place that you hold sacred in your memories and promises, for the First Unitarian Society, in thinking about your answers. By no means is this checklist perfect, or exhaustive, or final. But it is, it seems to me, a place to start our thinking, and a place to start a conversation. I would not expect anyone to be able to give an unambiguous Yes to every question - the last I knew, we didn't have any resident saints here at this Society, but maybe I just haven't been seeing the halos! And every question on this list is potentially a sermon in its own right, but let me review them quickly, and then we will take a little bit of time to contemplate them here together, after which you may take them home with you, or recycle them, depending upon how useful they appear to you.

There are three sets of questions that have to do with specific values practices, and then some more general categories. The first set of questions is concerned with giving form to our values in the world around us. There is an age-old tradition that can be found in various forms in many cultures which holds that any person, whatever their circumstances, ought to be able to give away approximately ten percent of their resources to help those in greater need. Some contemporary thinking suggests that this might mean giving five percent of one's annual income to the support of one's own religious community, and five percent to other organizations that work to advance one's own highest priority values. This might include second collections here at FUS, or regular contributions through paycheck withholding if your employer offers that option, or selecting among the steady stream of appeals that crowd our mailboxes. Such a commitment is never more needed than now, when the forces of political reaction and economic downturn are putting pressure on such organizations for their very survival. But giving money is only the first step, and it can also be a way of distancing ourselves from other real people. It is important that we engage in some form of personal contribution, where we interact with others and bring ourselves into actual contact with the needs of the world. You might serve in a soup kitchen, or volunteer in a classroom, or participate in a lakeshore cleanup day, or organize a benefit concert; anything that gets your body and your time involved. And then there is the contribution of your mind and thought, giving voice to your convictions as part of the democratic process and the shaping of community awareness. This might be through writing letters to the editor, or to your congress people; it might be through attending marches, rallies, or demonstrations; or it might be through activism in a stockholders' meeting; it means going on record in public for the views that you believe.

The second set of questions deals with the deepening and development of character, or the pursuit of a spiritual path. It is well said that the truly educated never graduate, and life-long learning is essential to the liberal and humanist worldview. This can be as simple as an intentional plan for certain kinds of challenging reading, or as organized as registering for actual classes. For myself, I could not endure solitary car travel without my college lectures on tape; my only hope is that I live long enough, and drive enough, that I am able to listen to all the courses I've been unable to resist buying! Reflective practice can take traditional forms, such as meditation or journaling. It may be active, like yoga or hiking, provided that there is a disciplined internal process that goes with it. Certain kinds of art can fill this role as well, such as painting or music. The object is routinely to create a mentally clear space in which meanings, questions, self-awareness and creativity can emerge. The deep question should be both enduring and evolving, something that emerges out of the challenges of a particular phase of life. "What does it mean to love someone?" "Is success worth the price?" "Am I prepared to die?" "Why is there injustice?" "How much beauty can I include in my life?" "How can I heal from suffering?"; these are just a few examples of the kinds of questions that we may run into in the course of our lives. It is important that we not let the transient trivialities of living absorb our attention and energy so fully that we never really come to consider the deeper questions. It may take some patience and some practice to discern them, but I believe that we all have such questions as companions on our life journeys, and it is helpful to give them recognition and words.

The final trio of questions has to do with particular religious identity and community here at FUS. Your membership here is only as meaningful as you make it, and these are ways of assessing your participation, in terms of involvement, giving, and understanding what this identity means to you. Again, the object is not so much to be able to claim some sort of perfect score, which doesn't exist anyway, but rather to use these questions as guides to an overall intentionality in your personal values and life plan.

The other sections offer lists; the first is a list of six dimensions of life in which people can sometimes find themselves out of balance. There are several reasons for concern about these. The first, of course, is that it is difficult to have a joyful and satisfying life of integrity if something is significantly wrong with your important relationships, your personal finances, your health, your ability to do useful work and pursue a responsible career, or your ability to manage the expression of your sexuality or the maintenance of a safe and nurturing home. When any of these matters are persistently in chaos, it also becomes difficult to witness credibly for your other values. Everyone has set backs and times of confusion in one area or another, of course, but we tend to take more seriously the wisdom of people whom we see leading generally sane and responsible lives in these basic dimensions.

The final question suggests that each of us should be contributing somehow to one or another of what have been called the 'great works' of the human enterprise. For some people, this happens in the context of their careers or paid work; for others, it is what they do as volunteers or as amateurs, a word meaning those who love something. While it is necessary to live as people of character and integrity in our individual existence, I believe that if that is all we do, we will find in the end that we have missed an essential part of the fully human life. For the world is moved forward by the ancient quests for peaceful relationships among neighbors and nations; for systems of justice that truly protect the vulnerable, and the rights of all; and for practices of compassion that help to mend the suffering created by disaster, error, and unwise choices. Other great works include the projects of human discovery, learning to know more about how the world works, and our own natures, from launching space probes to understanding organizations, contributing to the collective store of knowledge. Another is the unceasing effort to pass on all that we already know to each other and to the following generations; teaching in its myriad forms brings about the transformation of humanity, and is part of the great works. So also is the creation of beauty that enriches human experience, whether in music, literature, theater, in painting or sculpture, architecture, gardening, or any creative work that lifts the spirits and compellingly poses the deeper questions of human existence. Some part of each of our lives should be given to some aspect of these great works.

As I said, this list is by no means exhaustive; indeed, that is part of its virtue as a starting point for conversation. In the end, there is no simple cookbook recipe for developing moral character, or for living a fulfilled and decent life. We are all making it up as we go along, using our best wisdom and intuition, the guidance of example and the treasury of human experience. While our answers must be our own, the process need not be isolated; part of the reason that we come here is, as Kenneth Patton says, to try again that solitude found in the midst of those who, with us, seek their hidden reckonings. So let me close with two invitations. First, if this checklist turns out to be useful for you, but find yourself puzzled or troubled by some of the items, I would be pleased to explore these issues in a one on one conversation; do call me. Second, and more immediately, Barbara is going to play us some music, and then I invite you to take a few moments here and now to let these questions revolve in your mind. What do they suggest to you, here at the threshold of the year? Is there one in particular that seems to draw your attention? How might they help you to shape your character, and become the person you aspire to be, by remembering, profoundly and faithfully, what you want?

The Whole Life Humanism Checklist

Have I made and kept a commitment to regular charitable giving to organizations whose values are congruent with mine?

Did I participate in some form of hands-on service to others in my community?

Have I made some public statement or witness of my beliefs?

Am I continuing my education in a deliberate way?

Do I engage in some form of regular reflective practice?

What deep question am I wrestling with at this moment in my life?

Can I give a coherent definition of UU/Humanism to someone who asks me?

Have I made and kept a commitment to the financial support of FUS and the UUA?

What specific on-going activity do I participate in at FUS?

Am I at a place of sanity and responsibility about my:

Relationships?

Finances?

Health?

Career?

Sexuality?

Home?

Am I contributing to some worthwhile project:

Peace

Justice

Compassion

Discovery

Teaching

Beauty